At last I plucked up the courage to go and do an open mic night at a pub nearish where I live now. I thought when we moved in May there’d be a few in Banbury (our nearest town) but there aren’t. Then what with the accident at the beginning of June I somehow lost my confidence.
Last night was rather foggy and cold and damp but I refused to let it stop me, got the guitar out and went to Witney – about 40 minutes from here. It was weird at first as there was (obviously) no-one I knew there but once a few musicians arrived I got chatting to one or two people and then had the chance to play three songs which went down well – to be honest even if had gone badly wouldn’t have mattered – just a question of getting “back in the saddle” after a long break. So what with the amazing vocalisation/freestyle course I went on last week I feel a few green shoots of creativity slowly emerging.
Plus I’m knitting – a lovely big jumper for P and a cardigan for my little grandchild. Sounds like small things but I feel I’m slowly coming out of the wilderness – it’s been a long haul trying to get over the shock of the accident – I only realised recently just how much it had affected me and I’ve been getting some help with the symptons – nightmares, anxiety, disassociation and even feeling a bit depressed which just isn’t like me. I guess moving from city to country has been made more difficult to adjust to as a result of all this and finally I’m beginning to feel more at home here.
I love being with P and have no regrets – it’s just taken much longer than I expected to adjust.
I’m off to Bristol tomorrow for the second evening of the course and then meeting P in London on Saturday to go the Lord Mayor’s Fireworks (I’ll try and get pictures) then a couple of days with my daughter and the first birthday of my little grand-daughter.